Now That Hes Out

Written by a longtime psychiatrist who is himself gay, this unique guide will help parents deal with discovering they have a gay son, allowing them to more comfortably "come out of their closet as their son comes out of his." This is the first book to focus on the parents of gay sons and the mixed feelings they may have following a son's revelation that he is gay. On the one hand, parents want to be honest and open both about and with their son. On the other, they sometimes wish to cover up or ignore their son's sexuality—then are ashamed of themselves for feeling that way. The goal of this book is to enable parents to come to terms with such complex emotions so they can enjoy a genuine, positive relationship with a gay son. Using examples from the author's psychiatric practice and from his interactions with friends and relatives with gay sons, the first section of the book discusses the issues parents face, or think they will face, raising a gay son. The second part analyzes the causes of problems, while the third provides "therapy" devoted to helping parents manage and resolve negative or contradictory feelings and uncertainty. A bonus chapter suggests ways gay sons can help their parents parent them in a supportive, mutually beneficial way.